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<title>Hunger by XantunsiaRiveresiana</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23628316">Hunger</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/XantunsiaRiveresiana/pseuds/XantunsiaRiveresiana'>XantunsiaRiveresiana</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Xantunsia Riveresiana Chronicles [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Final Fantasy XIV</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Female Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Hunters &amp; Hunting, Introspection, Miqo'te Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Original Character-centric</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 18:21:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>614</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23628316</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/XantunsiaRiveresiana/pseuds/XantunsiaRiveresiana</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>an introspection on the beginning</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Xantunsia Riveresiana Chronicles [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1700809</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Hunger</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"When did it start?"<br/>
Xantunsia wondered to herself as she helped her sister up from another training-session thrashing. The slightly younger Viera was coming along for sure, but it was all too short a meal.</p>
<p>"You lasted a whole hour this time! What do you say we make the next goal two!"<br/>
The relentless Miqo'te said, flashing a taunting smile to hide her dissatisfaction. Her sister was much less successful in her emotional stealth, clearly displaying her dismay at the notion.</p>
<p>"H-how about and hour and ten minutes?" She gasped out, as her trainer pouted childishly at her perfectly reasonable response. The elder quickly shifted gears from her immature demeanor however, almost as if she could no longer hold something back.</p>
<p>"Well until then, you should rest up sis! You've got some merchant business to take care of I'm sure...<br/>
And then she changed again<br/>
"and I've got a hunt to do."</p>
<p>The look in her eyes shifted rapidly as she mentioned the hunt; a look she could hardly contain, that of a starving beast. To most, this would likely spark fear, but when Noir saw those eyes, all she felt was sorrow.<br/>
She knew that hunger wasn't a beast's choice, but simply a way to protect themselves. In most cases, from death and starvation, but in her sister's case, try as she might, she could never fully fathom what her hunger was protecting her from. Without that understanding, the viera could also never find an alternative to simply once again wishing her well as she strode off into danger.<br/>
But then, how could she truly fathom it? She had never been there.<br/>
The Island.</p>
<p>A land, a world even, separated from everything else. A land of death by any measure, but starved of hunts.<br/>
Finish off the injured stragglers, steal the eggs, assassinate the young ones, these battles and tactics would, just barely, sustain the young Xantunsia in this land, but they would not fill. You cannot fight if you want to survive, you cannot battle if you want to survive, you cannot hunt if you want to survive, you cannot do anything.<br/>
Except survive.<br/>
The feebleness, the helplessness of it all. With each denied battle, with each moment of survival, the pit in her stomach, the void in her soul grew more encompassing, like the night sky devoid of stars. You cannot see into it, you cannot grasp its depth, you cannot even know it has depth, it simply is.</p>
<p>Until the first star is seen<br/>
Until her first hunt.<br/>
No tricks, no stealing, no stragglers, she faced a monster, the monster faced her, and she killed it.<br/>
And she "felt" it for the first time<br/>
She knew then that she could do more than just survive. That she could fill herself, the pit, the void, the sky, this feeling that she didn't even know could be filled. This feeling that now that she knew was an emptiness, she knew she could never let herself return to again. The weakness of simply surviving this feeling.<br/>
But, at that time, what this feeling was, she couldn't tell.<br/>
But how could she?<br/>
How could she know she was starving If she'd never eaten?</p>
<p>Xantunsia turned away from her well wishing sister, who always looked like she had something to say in these moments, as she journeyed towards her next prey.<br/>
And as she did, she thought again<br/>
"I wonder when it started?"<br/>
Wonder all she might though, she never would come to an answer<br/>
Because truthfully, it probably never "started"<br/>
Hidden in the despair and starvation that was survival<br/>
And disguised as a fear of weakness<br/>
Beneath it all<br/>
She simply always was<br/>
Hungry.</p>
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